They sat on a park bench, new and gleaming in the sun from a protective glaze that coated the wooden seat and back. Bella pictured the old benches that creaked from years in the sun and rain, and grew to feel too soft for what one expected when sitting down on them. She and Edgar had sat on the benches when they were first dating and growing brave enough to make it public. They would sit close together, facing each other and talking in endless streams about nothing of importance and then kissing anytime the conversation took a quiet pause.
Now they sat at opposite ends, bodies facing forward, their heads turning only to talk. The breakup had already happened the week prior and Edgar had gone to stay with his brother Leonard. But he had not moved out his stuff and Bella took that as a good sign. He agreed to meet on a lunch break, now half over with hardly any conversation.
"I talked to my father yesterday," Bella said.
"Oh, yeah?"
"He asked if I'd returned the ring. Funny that's the first thing he wanted to be sure of."
Edgar nodded and chuckled.
"You didn't have to return it, you know," he said. "Our finances are so intertwined, it's probably half yours."
"I don't think I could sell it. Probably would stick it in a drawer. Bring it out anytime I needed a good cry."
"Don't say that," he said.
She saw him look at her then turn his head down to stare at his feet. She had read once in a magazine about body posture and how to know when someone is interested, simply by the way he stood or sat. Legs crossed toward you was a sure sign of interest. Bella watched Edgar shift in his seat. He crossed his right leg over his left, sending it pointing away from her.
"I'm sorry," he said. "It's hard for me to explain what changed. I know it's confusing. It is for me, too."
Bella nodded. She wanted to point out that nothing was the same for him as it was for her since he had made the unanimous decision to call off their engagement. Regardless of how confused he was, or said he was, he'd made the choice for both of them. But she wasn't interested in putting him on the defensive and starting a new fight. She wanted to hold onto her hope.
"What if we tried again?" she asked. "Maybe the week apart is what you needed. Your things are still at home..."
"I was actually going to email you today, before you called. I'm arranging for movers to come on Friday for my things. I can come pack up on Thursday while you're at work. So I don't disturb you."
It was her turn to look down at her feet. She saw that she was sitting with her legs crossed at the ankles, toes pointed toward Edgar. She uncrossed them and crossed them again to point in the other direction, but she felt no comfort or relief in trying to reject him back. Her shoulders slumped over and she felt the crying erupt deep within then travel slowly from her core to burn a path down her cheeks.
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